Greetings, Abby I’m a gay man of 22 who has tried dating apps without success. One of the guys was ten years my senior, a former Air Force member, and incredibly needy during the initial hours of texting. He claimed to be incredibly in love with me and to want to spend the rest of his life with me.I tried talking to other guys, but none of them ever made an effort to continue the discussion. I am at a loss on what to do. Some co-workers and friends I mentioned this to said I should look only at men of my race. Race doesn’t matter to me. Regardless of color, I have witnessed a lot of males abuse their partners.The qualities that make someone pleasant to be around are important to me. What pastimes do they have? What path do they hope to pursue in their career? What are their methods in the kitchen? Do they maintain order? I also don’t like going to parties, drinking, or having casual sex.Although there aren’t many LGBTQ communities where I am right now, I would really love to find a gentleman for myself. I think I’ll be by myself for longer than I had anticipated. Having a particular someone would be lovely, but I’m trying to concentrate on my work and studies. Any suggestions? — FAILING AT IT IN NORTH CAROLINA
Stories by
Abigail Van Buren
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Greetings, failing: Make sure you aren t using dating apps that are geared toward hookups. Instead, look for those that are geared toward relationships. They are out there. Also, make it a priority to visit the nearest large city and go to the LGBTQ community center so you can meet new people with similar interests. While I can t guarantee you ll find romance, you may make some lasting friends.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby atwww.DearAbby.comor P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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