Greetings, Abby Recently, my daughter, who is eighteen, ended her relationship with her boyfriend. In addition to other indications of his infidelity, she overheard him on the phone conversing with another woman. Both she and I are inconsolable. Although he clearly didn’t care about my daughter or her sentiments, I still thought the guy was great.I assured my daughter that everything would work out in due time. It’s difficult for her, though, because she has a lot of memories of him. After sending her an apology message, he blocked her. He blocked her on Instagram as well. She is unable to comprehend why. I suggested that he might have been told to do so by the other girl or that he no longer wanted to interact with her. How can I support my daughter during this difficult time? — In New York, love hurtsDEAR LOVE HURTS: Encourage your daughter to discard any mementos she may have of this affair or to store them somewhere she won’t see them. She feels the same way about music that makes her think of him. By keeping themselves occupied and denying themselves time to dwell, people are able to move past these upsetting events. Urge her to stay active and interact with friends. The young man’s apology and subsequent blocking of her are likely the result of his feelings of guilt and his desire to move on.
Stories by
Abigail Van Buren
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Dear Abby: My mom makes sure I know how much she hates me every chance she gets
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Dear Abby: When I don t answer lonely widower s phone calls, he gets furious
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Dear Abby: Spanish schoolgirl looks for lessons about love
Greetings, Abby Our son-in-law and daughter-in-law reside with us. She wants to modernize the cabinets at her own expense as she paints the interior of our 27-year-old home. Her father becomes irate and accuses her of attempting to take over his home before he passes away every time she makes an effort to improve the appearance. (This is untrue.) He claims that anyone would concur with him if you asked them. He’s wrong, in my opinion. How do we proceed? — Emerging in IndiaSPRUCING UP NADEAR: Your spouse should control his temper if your daughter and her husband want to paint and install new cabinets solely in the part of the house they live in. Your husband’s rage might be understandable if your daughter is attempting to do more than that with the hope that she will eventually inherit the property. All of you are grownups. Find a way to talk about this and come to an agreement.
Greetings, Abby I’m starting to lose my mind over my mom. According to her, I need a job with regular, steady hours, health insurance, and a retirement plan in order to consider myself a successful career woman.My work schedule has been temporarily disrupted due to the pandemic. I can handle retirement and insurance on my own, but I don’t have any perks. How do I get my mother to see that and stop treating me like a helpless child with no future plans? — THE END OF WITS IN MARYLANDDEAR AT THE END OF WITS: Be patient with her; a mother’s responsibility is to worry about her kids. Show her the documents that back up your claims if your assurance isn’t enough to silence her.
Abigail Van Buren, better known as Jeanne Phillips, is the author of Dear Abby. Her mother, Pauline Phillips, began the company. For more information, visit www.DearAbby.com or send an email to P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
