Greetings, Abby I’ve been with my partner, Chad, for ten years. Despite not having children together, we have been each other’s stepparents since the start of our relationship.
We have had to cope with his unrelenting ex-wife, who has had several relationships, ever since we started dating. In addition, we had to deal with my ex-husband leaving the state and being separated from our kid.
Dealing with children and ex-partners has, to put it mildly, caused us to neglect ourselves. In addition, Chad, my daughter, and I all had surgery due to health issues. He only asked me to marry him when he was recovering from surgery. He did it once in the recovery room as he was coming out of anesthesia and again shortly after we got home after another procedure.
Is it incorrect of me to disregard the post-surgery recommendations?
We just became grandparents, and I don’t want to disappoint him by declining. I think I need a proposal that is crystal clear. WANTS IT IN UTAH FOR REAL
Stories by
Abigail Van Buren
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DEAR WANTS IT: You and Chad have been involved in this relationship for ten years. whether you want to marry him, ask him whether he remembers making the proposal, which he has done twice previously. Inform him that you might be amenable to a proposal if he asked in the daylight, but that you could not honestly hold him to one that was made while he was under the effects of anesthetic or painkillers. Next, cross your fingers.
Abigail Van Buren, better known as Jeanne Phillips, is the author of Dear Abby. Her mother, Pauline Phillips, began the company. For more information, visit www.DearAbby.com or send an email to P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
