Miss Manners: How should I respond to ‘Likes’ on dating site if I’m not interested in the person?

Greetings, Miss Manners Since I’ve never dated online, I would appreciate your guidance on how to reply to likes when you’re not interested. I believe that a message should have some reaction, but I don’t want to mislead anyone. Additionally, I don’t really want to engage in lengthy discussions with people who don’t seem like a good fit.

Does it matter if people simply send a “like” without sending a message? Or do they fall beyond the age range I specified? I want to treat everyone with respect, and I’m shocked and appreciative when others are interested. Any recommendations?

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PERSONAL READER: The etiquette, as it exists, is still developing in this area. Miss Manners, however, will make an effort to help.

One of the most confusing aspects of such businesses is that they cross the boundary between the commercial and the social — not just without a thought, but without even realizing there is a distinction.

However, that misunderstanding serves a purpose in this instance. According to them, the goal of these websites is to meet someone. People will therefore get the wrong idea if you respond to that initial outreach when you are not interested, whether it was a written message or just a “like.”

Miss Manners therefore recommends against responding, which she justifies by application of the business etiquette rule that you are not required to return calls from strangers seeking to sell you something.

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Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website,www.missmanners.com; to her email,[email protected]; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.

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